Refractions
by sunny2017
Summary: Author's Notes, Post Hogwarts, Epilogue has yet to happen. After experiencing a bad breakup, Harry finds himself falling for an old school rivalry.    Rated M for future chapters.
1. Birthday

Be not afraid of greatness: some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them. – William Shakespeare

**Chapter 1: Birthday**

Harry couldn't believe it, he was finally a man. It was his eighteenth birthday.

A lot has changed for Harry in the past few months, here he was living in Grimmauld Place with Kreacher, and it was decision time. Would he return to Hogwarts and finish his schooling or would he accept the job Kingsley offered him in the Auror office?

He sat down to eat the oatmeal Kreacher had sat out for him and opened the morning's Daily Prophet. Plastered on the front page was the news on the latest trials of the Wizengamot. Lucius Malfoy and his family had been cleared of all charges.

Harry knew that his testimony on the behalf of the Malfoys is what tipped the scale in their favor. He had explained how Narcissa had lied to Voldemort, and how Draco had lied to Bellatrix at Malfoy Manor before that. And how Lucius just plain didn't want to be a Death Eater anymore but had no way out.

He closed his eyes as the memory of the fire enveloped him, just as he, Ron, and Hermione were getting ready to flee for their lives, he had this feeling in the pit of his stomach, he wouldn't of had been able to live with himself if he left Malfoy to die. So he and Ron went and saved Malfoy and Goyle, even though Ron didn't think they deserved saving. Harry still remembers the sight of Crabbe falling and being consumed by the flames, and even if he had been the one to cast the Fiendfyre, that was not a death sentence.

Upon finishing the article he noticed that Lucius would be closely monitored by the Ministry for the next year while Narcissa and her son received full pardon. Nothing else in the paper caught his attention and so he set it aside and finished his oatmeal and tea, and soon began brooding.

He knew Hermione had already decided to return to Hogwarts, and she wanted Ron and him to return as well. Although he loved Hogwarts, he was never big on the actually studying. Harry already knew that Ron would not return if he didn't. But Ginny would be completing her seventh year along with Hermione…

Weighing his options he got up and prepared for the day, and then soon after, decision made, he sat down to send an owl to Hermione and Ron to confirm their lunch plans to celebrate his birthday. Just as his new owl, Borr, flew out the window, Kreacher came into the room. "Master has a birthday today, shall Kreacher prepare for guests tonight?"

"Not today, Kreacher," Harry said. For now it was just lunch with Ron and Hermione and dinner with Ginny. "Maybe this Saturday though, I will know for sure this evening, and don't expect me for lunch or dinner as I have plans."

Kreacher bowed and left the room to do his routine cleaning. Since their return from Hogwarts after the battle the old house-elf has been working hard to keep it cleaner than he ever had before.

Later that afternoon Harry sat at a small café in Diagon Alley waiting for his friends, people milling in and out around him. Since the end of the war people have come out of hiding and reopened their shops and cafés in the wizarding alley in the heart of London, hidden from muggle view.

He glanced up when the door's bell tingled expecting to see Ron and Hermione, but instead it was Draco Malfoy. He was dressed in a black button-down shirt and casual blue jeans. His he was pale as ever and his eyes had a haunted look about them; this was most likely his first appearance in public since the trial.

Harry couldn't stop looking at him as he sat down at a table in a secluded corner and ordered a pot of tea. Memories from the Room of Requirement came flooding back, and he could feel Draco's arms wrapped tightly around him as though as if they were back on the broom fleeing for their lives.

He only managed to look away when the door opened again and he heard Hermione cry, "Happy birthday, Harry!" but not before he made eye contact with Malfoy.

He smiled and pushed the memory aside as his two best friends as they made their way to his table and sat down. "Well?" Hermione asked, she sure didn't know how to waste time.

"I'm not going back," Harry said simply.

Hermione stared at him, "I always knew you wouldn't, I just hoped that for once in my life I was wrong."

"Wait, so Harry since you aren't going then that means I don't have to," Ron smiled.

"Your mother wants you to completely your education," Hermione said firmly.

"But I would be the same year as Ginny, and we all know she would do nothing but show me up."

"That shouldn't keep you from continuing your education! What about your N.E.W.T.S.? What about a job?"

"George has offered me a job at the shop." Ron said leaning back in his chair. "He could do it alone, but he's unsure of how he could handle it..."

Ron's voice trailed off as they all remembered Fred. His death had hit them all hard, but hardest of all was his twin brother. From the day they were born they were rarely apart, except for two instances, where George got his ear blown off and when Fred died.

Harry cleared his throat and inconspicuously wiped the moisture from his eyes and noticed Ron do the same. The waitress brought them their sandwiches as Harry said, "I am taking the job with the Auror office to catch the remaining Death Eaters out there."

Hermione pursed her lips and didn't say anything, but Harry already knew she didn't approve. He didn't say anything and just took a bite of his sandwich. It was his birthday; he knew she was too polite to spoil it by convincing him to do otherwise.

Ron's talking around his food, "Do you honestly think many other people from our year who didn't get to attend are honestly going to go back?"

Hermione shook her head to admit her defeat, and all three ate in silence relishing the time together. Harry glanced to where Malfoy was sitting and found himself looking straight into his grey eyes. Fear and jealously carved into his face Malfoy quickly got up and walked out of the café, leaving a galleon on the table.

After lunch Ron and Harry followed Hermione into various shops while she bought her supplies for Hogwarts. Harry tried to converse, but his mind kept going back to Malfoy, and then to his upcoming date with Ginny, and then back to Malfoy. The thought of running into Malfoy gave him butterflies in his stomach, but he chocked it off to nerves. Unfortunately, they didn't run into him again.

At seven o'clock sharp Harry Apparated to the Burrow to pick up Ginny, but was bombarded with hugs and kisses from Molly Weasley, the closest person Harry could think of as a mother.

"Happy birthday, Harry!" she cried as she smothered him in more kisses.

"Thanks, Mrs. Weasley," Harry said blushing. "And thank you for the sweets, they are marvelous."

"Oh you are so welcome, dear!" Mrs. Weasley had sent over cakes and tarts for his birthday earlier that morning.

He turned his head as he heard someone coming down the stairs, and his breath caught in his throat when he laid his eyes on Ginny. She was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen; her long red hair flowing and dressed in a light sundress.

"Hello, Harry, happy birthday," her voice was as smooth as silk, her brown eyes shining as she looked at Harry.

Harry offered his arm and they walked outside so she could Side-Along Apparate to London. Instead of going to Diagon Alley, they walked among the crowded streets to a small Muggle restaurant in the center of the city, not far from Grimmauld Place. After a wonderful dinner filled with laughter and conversation, they walked to Harry's home, and on the doorstep, he leaned in and kissed her for the first time that night.

Harry had always loved kissing Ginny, he thought she was a much better kisser than Cho Chang, she kisses could be soft and gentle, but filled with passion at the same time. This was not one of those kisses. Her tongue quickly found his and Harry could not get the door opened fast enough as they stumbled inside.

Not breaking the kiss, Harry picked Ginny up and carried her through the hallway and up the stairs to the second floor then to his bedroom. He set her down and pulled away only enough to look deep into her eyes. He loved this girl so much he could feel a lump in his throat. He kissed her with more passion than ever and led her to the bed, but before he could lay her down she pulled away.

"Harry…" Her voice trailed off. "I have a curfew."

Harry went back to kissing her just as passionately as before, their bodies pressed together. He could feel an erection pressing against his pants as he deepened the kiss, one hand going past her waist to cup her cheek, the other on the back of her head fingers entwined with her hair.

He could feel her tried to put space between them, but she did not break the kiss. When she came up for air, he trailed kisses along her jaw and down her neck. "Ginny, please…" his voice was husky between kisses.

"Harry, I can't." Ginny said simply.

Mood gone, Harry pulled away, "Why don't you ever want to do it? We've been together over a year."

Ginny looked away, "It's not you, it's me…"

Harry rolled his eyes not buying it, but lets the matter slide. "Before you go to school though?"

When she looked at him, he already knew her answer would be no, but she said, "We will just see." She kissed his cheek, "Goodbye, Harry, and happy birthday." She then walked over to the fireplace and Flooed herself back to the Burrow.


	2. A Letter

I am sorry for this one being so short! The way I write is the characters write the story for me, and Harry didn't have much to say in this chapter. Next one will be better!

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><p>Misconception [mis-kuhn-sep-shuhn]. noun. a false or mistaken view, opinion, or attitude.<p>

**Chapter 2: A Letter**

The next week passed without much happening. Harry owled Kingsley telling him that he was accepting the job, and went about his normal business. He was surprised when he received an owl from Professor McGonagall requesting he come to a meeting at Hogwarts the next day. Wondering what the meeting would be about, he replied back saying he would be there.

As he went down for breakfast he found a letter on top of his usual copy of the Daily Prophet. Intrigued, he opened it and was shocked as he started reading:

_Potter,_

_So many times I tried to sit down and write this letter, but the words never came, at least not in a proper way. So many letters ended up in the fire, I have probably written hundreds. So I will just speak plainly._

_I don't think I ever formally thanked you for saving my life, or for what you did at the trials. _

_I hope we can let bygones be bygones and move forward with our lives. _

_I know you asked why I didn't tell Aunt Bella it was you on that horrible day at the Manor last Easter, but it is an answer I do not think you would understand. Please don't pressure me, just know that I was in a place I did not want to be, I wanted out. I felt bad for how horrible I treated you all those years. I was tired of fighting._

_Thank you, Harry Potter, for everything._

_Draco Malfoy_

_P.S. I hope you had a marvelous birthday._

Harry set the letter down and stared off into space. Malfoy had actually written him a letter. Malfoy was sorry? Unsure if he should respond or not, he set the letter aside and opened the Prophet as he tucked into his eggs and bacon.

The day passed with Harry reading and rereading Draco's letter over and over again. He kept remembering seeing Draco in the café on his birthday. He kept remembering seeing him in the Room of Requirement. That night as he laid his head down he was filled with dreams he knew Ginny would not approve of.


	3. A Coming of Ways

Love is everything it's cracked up to be…It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for. –Erica Jong

**Chapter 3: A Coming of Ways**

The next day Harry arrived at Hogwarts by portkey, and went straight to the Headmistress's office. Expecting guests, Professor McGonagall had moved the gargoyle away to reveal the staircase it normally concealed. Harry slowly walked up, remembering all the times he walked up those exact stairs to see Dumbledore. He was surprised to when he walked into the open office that Hagrid, Professor Slughorn, and Professor Flitwick.

"Harry! How good it is to see you, m'boy!" cried Professor Slughorn as he came over and shook Harry's hand.

After greetings and each take a seat, Harry noticed there was a seat empty and wondered what this meeting would be about. McGonagall quickly answered his puzzled face.

"As soon as our last guest arrives we will get down to business," she stated with a grim look on her face.

They heard footsteps coming up the stairs; Harry then turned and to his surprise he was looking straight at Draco Malfoy, who was standing in the doorway unsure of himself.

McGonagall gestured to the open seat across from Harry, and the meeting then began.

"Today, we are here to discuss a touchy subject," McGonagall began. "Severus Snape was a Headmaster of Hogwarts before his death, but, should his portrait be hung up among the others in the office?"

"He abandoned his post," Flitwick said simply.

"But, Harry spoke as if he knew sometin' nobody else did in the Great Hall oh so lon' ago," stated Hagrid.

Everyone turned and looked at Harry, except for Draco, who was staring at the floor. He only looked up after clearing his throat.

"Not to sound rude, but why am I here?" he said softly.

Everyone stared at Draco for a moment, when McGonagall broke the silence. "Why, you were the student closest to Professor Snape, surely you would have an opinion on the matter?"

Draco gave everyone a blank stare, "As a student when he was Headmaster, he did what he had to do. He protected the students from the worst of it, and it was the Carrows everyone had to worry about." He shuddered slightly.

Harry, looking at Draco the whole time, said, "Snape was Dumbledore's man the whole time."

Everyone but Draco turned their attention to Harry, and he proceeded to explain how Snape had led them to the Sword of Gryffindor via patronus; how he had put a fake sword in the Lestranges' vault; and finally, how Dumbledore was sick, and had asked Snape to kill him so Draco would not have to.

Draco chose that moment to look up at Harry, and he could not read the emotions in his grey eyes. "Dumbledore died on his own terms, not on Voldemort's terms," Harry finished. "I want Snape's portrait hung in the office; he deserves it. Severus Snape was the bravest man I ever knew."

More discussion was revolving around him as the others discussed the new information, but Harry was not listening. He was still looking at Draco. Was that pain in his eyes?

"Fine, decision has been made," McGonagall stated, "Severus's portrait shall hang in the Headmaster office with the others."

Later that evening, Harry sat at the bar of the Three Broomsticks, next to Draco. Harry had no idea why he had a mental lapse and invited Draco for a drink. They sipped their Firewhiskey in silence, finally Harry broke the ice.

"I got your letter," he looked everywhere but at Draco.

Draco nodded.

"I accept your apology."

"Was Professor Snape really the bravest man you ever knew?"

Harry thought for a moment, "Yes."

"You are holding something back, I know you are."

Harry looked at Draco, "Snape's patronus was a doe."

"So?"

Deciding to take a walk down memory lane, "Draco, while he was dying, he gave me some of his memories, to explain everything. One of them was a memory of the day my mother found out she was a witch.

"They grew up together, and the first attended Hogwarts together. He was in love with her...but something happened between them, an argument, and next thing she was dating my dad, they got married, had me, and Snape begged Dumbledore to protect them after Voldemort heard the prophecy. Then, for seven years, Snape did everything he could to protect me. The child of the woman he loved."

Harry could watched Draco slowly turning and looking at him, "His patronus was a doe because your mother's patronus was a doe?"

"Yes."

"Patronuses take the form of the one of the person you love?"

"Not all the time, but they can. Mine is a stag, like my dad's—"

"And your mother's a doe."

They sat in silence for a while, until Draco asked, "How do you cast a patronus?"

Harry then explained how to cast one, and how it's only have lots of practice that a person has a corporeal patronus in the shape of something.

"I shall have to see if I can do it sometime," Draco stated.

After a few more drinks, followed by merry talk now that the awkwardness was gone, Draco and Harry parted ways, but Harry was sure he would be seeing Draco again, and soon.


	4. A Thing Called Love

I have been uber busy packing since I am moving to in less than a week! This one, again, is shorter. Hopefully I shall have more time to write after the move! Enjoy!

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><p>Love [luhv]. <em>noun, verb<em>. _–noun:_ a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. _–verb (used with object) _to have a profoundly tender, passionate affection for (another person).

**Chapter 4: A Thing Called Love**

Auror training was probably the hardest thing Harry ever went through. It was physically and mentally demanding, but he loved every second of it.

Since Harry had so far proved himself on many occasions he was allowed to put some of this training on hold until the remaining Death Eaters were imprisoned. They traveled everywhere, searching high and low; when the last of them had been convicted and sent to Azkaban, Harry started his training again.

Every Wednesday Harry met Ron at The Leaky Cauldron for a butterbeer during their lunch hours. Most of the time they just remembered their times at Hogwarts, but today was different. Ron had announced that on Saturday Hermione was going to me in Hogsmeade, and he was going to see her.

"I think I love her, Harry," he stated proudly.

Harry choked on his butterbeer.

"Wow, mate," Ron glared at Harry. "I expected a better response. This is a big step in our relationship ya know. Commitment. I am going to tell her. Should I tell her? Bloody hell, I should tell her. Do you think she feels the same way?"

"The only way to tell is to ask her right?"

"Yeah, I guess so." They resumed their drinking in silence. "You should tell Ginny, ya know."

"Tell Ginny what?" Harry looked absolutely confused.

"Tell her you love her!"

Harry looked out the window, fall was coming; the leaves had started to change colors. He thought for a moment, three months ago he would have agreed with Ron, that he loved Ginny. Now, being away from her, he was not sure. "I don't want to complicate our relationship, Ron."

"Yeah," Ron's voice trailed off. As he stared at his mug, he said quietly, "Me and Hermione, well, we haven't done anything besides snogging yet; she says she wants it to be special. I don't have the heart to tell her that Lavender liked to go a bit farther, although she already most likely knows...Hermione knows everything. But I don't think I'll tell her. At least not this weekend. I don't want to ruin it..."

Harry stopped listening to Ron's ramblings as he contemplated his relationship with Ginny. She didn't write as often as she said she would. And the only other times he got to see her before she left for Hogwarts was at the Burrow. On the day she left he was gone; he did not get to see her off at Platform 9 ¾. He wondered what she was doing right now, and if she missed him, or was thinking about him. What if she wasn't being faithful? After all, he was. Well fuck, he knew in a relationship with Ginny the only way to get some tail was to cheat.

"Harry? Harry! Hello! Have you been listening?"

"Oh! What? I'm sorry, Ron, I had Occlumency training earlier and I am beat."

Ron gave him a look of understanding, and changed the subject to Quidditch.

As they discussed this season's teams, a face popped into Harry's head. A face that had been haunting Harry's dreams. A face that had blonde hair and steely grey eyes.


	5. Icy Paths

After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music. –Aldous Huxley

**Chapter 5: Icy Paths**

Harry had not seen Draco since that summer, after the meeting at Hogwarts. But on a fateful day right before Christmas, he was him again.

Harry was thinking of buying Ginny a ring, a promise ring, for Christmas. They were too young to be engaged; at least he thought they were. Ron might disagree, as he is thinking of proposing to Hermione, although that might be because he just wants to shag her.

He had visited various muggle and wizard shops, but it seemed that none fit what he had in mind. He was rushing through Diagon Alley, not paying attention to where he was going, and slipped on a patch of ice.

Thankfully, he bumped into someone has he did this, which kept him from falling flat on his face. Slender pale fingers gripped his wrist to steady them both.

He looked up to apologize for his clumsiness, only to look into the eyes of none other than Draco Malfoy.

Draco smiled half-heartedly, and it made Harry's stomach do somersaults. Apologies and formalities were lost on his tongue. He was suddenly very aware that Draco was still holding his wrist, and he was still holding Draco's arm. Suddenly, they both released each other, and Draco cleared his throat. "Shall we get out of the cold?"

Harry nodded, and they proceeded to the Leaky Cauldron, but instead of stopping, they were just passing through. Draco then led them down the block to a muggle coffee shop. After they received their orders, they sat down at a table in the corner, close to a speaker, which was softly playing muggle Christmas tunes.

They drank their coffee in silence, neither sure what exactly to say. Draco took out the cookie he had ordered, and split it in half, and offered the other to Harry. He took it, and thanked him. Nothing more was spoken until a while later, when "Baby, It's Cold Outside" floated over the speakers.

Harry knew the song well, he had heard it many times growing up, what surprised him was when Draco softly started to sing along.

"I really can't stay," Draco sand as he stood up.

"But, baby it's cold outside," Harry sang along.

"I've got to go away."

"Baby it's cold outside," Harry stood and grabbed Draco's hand.

"This evening has been."

"Been hoping that you'd drop in."

"So very nice."

"I'll hold your hands, they're just like ice."

"My mother will start to worry," Draco started toward the door.

"Beautiful, what's your hurry," Harry followed him.

"My father will be pacing the floor."

"Listen to the fireplace roar."

"So really I'd better scurry."

"Beautiful, please don't hurry," Harry grabbed Draco's hand again.

"Well maybe just a half a drink more," Draco smiled.

"Put some music on while I pour," Harry led Draco back to their table.

"The neighbors might think."

"Baby, it's bad out there."

"Say, what's in this drink."

"No cabs to be had out there."

"I wish I knew how."

"Your eyes are like starlight"

"To break the spell."

"I'll take your hat, your hair looks swell."

"I ought to say no, no, no, sir."

"Mind if I move closer," Harry moved closer.

"At least I'm gonna say that I tried."

"What's the sense in hurting my pride?"

"I really can't stay," Draco leaned in.

"Baby, don't hold out," Harry looked deep into Draco eyes.

"Ahh, but it's cold outside," they both sang together, right before Harry's lips touched Draco's.

Draco surprised Harry by returning the kiss. His lips were so soft, kissing Draco was nothing like kissing Ginny. Draco pulled Harry closer instead of pushing away. His tongue gently prodded at Harry's lips. Harry felt his fingers run through Draco's hair. He had only experienced this moment in his dreams. He couldn't be kissing Draco right now.

Harry broke the kiss first, and stared into Draco's eyes, hungry for more. But, he had a nagging thought that this would be considered cheating, but he shoved it to the back of his mind. His thumb caressed the back of Draco's neck, and Harry felt him shiver.

Harry leaned in close and whispered, "I don't know what my feelings are. I am confused beyond reason. I just know I want to hold you and never let you go."

Draco looked at Harry and said, "Your place, Christmas Eve, midnight?"

Harry nodded, "I look forward to seeing you."

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><p>I had a certain rendition of "Baby, It's Cold Outside" in mind when I wrote this. You can listen to it here: youtube [dot] comwatch?v=MTnwv2NN-DI :)


	6. A Not So Merry Little Christmas Eve

Say Happy Birthday to me! And my present to you guys is a new chapter! Unfortunately, it was a depressing one. It broke my heart.

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><p>So stand in the rain, stand your ground. Stand up when it's all crashing down. You stand through the pain, you won't drown, and one day what's lost can be found. You stand in the rain. –Superchic[k]<p>

**Chapter 6: A Not So Merry Little Christmas Eve**

Harry woke on Christmas Eve with a knot in his stomach; he was going to see Malfoy today. He had many mixed feelings, he dreamed of the kiss they shared. Was he gay? He did not think he was, but he was a bundle of nerves anyway.

He still had to deal with Ginny. He had been spending many hours thinking on the matter, even before he kissed Malfoy. Draco. Malfoy. No, Draco. Harry hated the inner struggle of what to call him, maybe he should base it how Draco called him. But what if Draco was doing the same? Should he just call him it?

He told Kreacher to have the place spotless by midnight; he knew Draco was used to living in a spotless home, whereas Harry never minded clutter here and there. Made the place look lived in, whereas Malfoy Manor did not, that Harry was certain.

Later that morning he Flooed to the Burrow, to be greeted with hugs and kisses from Mrs. Weasley. Ginny stood in the background, not quite meeting his eye. Taking in a deep, shaking breath to calm his nerves, he went up to her and took her hand.

"Can I have a moment in private, Ginny?" he asked quietly.

She looked at him then, and nodded, and led him to the sitting room. Hermione and the other Weasley children went outside for a snowball fight.

Once they were seated on the couch, he was quiet for a moment, and then decided to forge on.

"Ginny, why have you been distant with me?"

She did not say anything, nor did she look at him.

"Ginny, this has been frustrating. We have been dating for over a year, and you don't let me touch you. Now I understand if you aren't ready or anything, but you never give me a reason. And since you returned to school you have become…cold."

Harry stood and walked to the window, watching the antics of those outside. After George nailed Ron in the face, he turned and looked at Ginny, who was looking at the floor. Leaning against the seal, "Ginny, this relationship isn't working. I love you. I really do. But, lately, I've been the only one working at this. I know you are grieving for your brother, but I am too. Fred might of as well been my own brother." He stopped talking and exhaled deeply. "Maybe we need a break."

She looked at him then, tears in her eyes. "Harry…I, I made a mistake." She looked back at the floor. "Back when you were hunting for Horcruxes, I, I was lonely. And well, after a win against Slytherin, the win for the House Cup, we threw a party. Firewhiskey was there, and a lot of us got drunk." She blushed and refused to look at him. "Don't blame him, Harry, he doesn't even remember, not only was he too drunk but I oblivated his mind afterwards for good measure."

Tears were fall freely down her face, and Harry felt anger building up inside him. "You…" his voice cracked. "You were unfaithful?"

She sobbed this time, it broke his heart, but he felt nothing but white-hot anger. "Who?"

She looked at him, pleading, "Don't be mad at him, like I said, he was too drunk. He wouldn't of done it in his right mind. And I instigated it…I was lonely, Harry!"

He took a step towards her. "Who?"

She bit her lip and looked away, "Seamus."

It was a whisper, he almost didn't hear it. "Why?"

"Harry…I'm so sorry! I didn't—"

"DIDN'T MEAN TO? YOU BLOODY HELL FUCKING DIDN'T MEAN SHIT!" Rage built up inside him. He clenched his fist, willing himself not to strike her. The clatter of pots and pans in the kitchen quieted; he knew he was drawing attention.

"Harry, I was lonely! You were gone!"

"THAT IS NO FUCKING EXCUSE!" He stalked to the door, his voice cold when he turned back to face her. "I am glad we never went that far, Ginny. I trusted you. I fucking loved you. But I guess that wasn't enough. And you put this on yourself." He walked out of the room.

When Harry entered the kitchen he could still hear her sobs, but he was unaffected by them. Mrs. Weasley knew something was wrong, but did not pry. Harry felt dead. Everything he did, he did for Ginny. Ron came in to see if Harry wanted to join them outside, but he declined. His heart was not in it.

He didn't think it would hurt this much. But, he had not known Ginny had cheated on him. How could he trust her again? Even if this thing with Draco had not come up, he did not think he would have stayed with Ginny.

Then, he let loose. He sobbed. His broken heart ached more than he ever dreamed. Mrs. Weasley dropped everything, and next thing Harry knew her arms were around him, and he cried into her shoulder. It felt so good, to cry, and be comforted. He never had that experience growing up; in fact, he wasn't allowed to cry much. During his years at Hogwarts, so many times he wanted to break down, but he had to remain strong. He was Harry Potter, The Boy Who Lived. People depended on him.

Mrs. Weasley told him to go home, that she would tell Ron and Hermione to visit him tomorrow.

He went outside and Apparated to the Leaky Cauldron, which, lucky for him, was open on Christmas Eve. He drank until he was numb, and then some more. Shot after shot of Firewhiskey, until it did not burn his throat anymore. This was not how he had planned to spend his Christmas. But then again, this was not how he had planned to break up with Ginny, either. He did not want hurt feelings, and they were going to spend a happy Christmas Eve dinner together. But, she ruined it, just like she ruined their relationship.

Harry was so drunk he could barely walk, and was going to order another round when he remembered Draco. He Flooed back to Grimmauld Place and sobered up. Then began to get ready for when Draco showed up at midnight. Secretly hoping Draco would like the present Harry had gotten for him.

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><p>I wanted to write Draco in this chapter, but he wants a chapter all to himself. He can be really selfish sometimes. Jeeze, I couldn't even bribe him with Skittles! I even told him it was my birthday! But he is relentless. I wonder what Harry got him?<p> 


	7. A Night to Remember

So, I have not fallen off the face of the earth...I simply don't have internet for awhile. I just got done moving. I hope you enjoy this chapter...I actually enjoyed writing it :)

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><p>Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind. –William Shakespeare<p>

**Chapter 7: A Night to Remember**

Harry did not realize how nervous he was until he started pacing and constantly looked at the clock on the mantel. He could feel the butterflies in his stomach as he glanced at the Christmas tree. He normally would not of had gotten one, but with Draco coming over, he decided to splurge to give the place a more homey feel. He originally was not going to live in Grimmauld Place, but times changed. He had no desire to return to the Dursleys; even if things could possibly be different now.

Harry walked over to the mantel and picked up the loan Christmas card sitting there.

Before he left for the Burrow that morning, Harry had an owl he had never seen before waiting for him on his window seal. He went and took the letter, gave the owl a treat, and had set it aside while he got ready for the day.

As he sat down for breakfast, he took the letter and looked more closely at it. It was not the normal heavy parchment that most wizards use for mail, but it looked at felt like an ordinary Muggle car. It was addressed to him, with no stamp, no return address, and the owl had left indicating that they did not expect an immediate response.

Harry opened the letter and found what he suspected, a Muggle Christmas card, but who would send him one? As he opened it to his shock he read,

_Dear Harry,_

_I am sure you are quite surprised to hear from me, but, rest assured I am just as surprised that I am sitting down to pen this letter to you._

_I know we had our differences, and I know I treated you horribly all those years you were with us. You were (and still are) family, and I did anything but treat you like family. _

_I never told you what I saw the night those things attacked us. I believe you called them "dementors." You said that we relive our worst memories, but to be honest I never really had a bad memory. But after the incident, every bad memory is how I treated you._

_I saw myself that night. I saw myself as a horrible, mean, spoiled person I was. But you must believe me when I say I've changed. You saved my life. I won't ever forget that._

_I live in Manchester now, working and whatnot. I didn't continue on to the university, didn't really have the grades. I managed to find a person that is like you, but not really, they said they were a "squib" whatever that means. They gave me the connections to purchase this owl so I can write to you. (I have no idea if you receive regular mail at your place.)_

_I wish you the best of luck, Cousin Harry._

_Happy Christmas,_

_Dudley _

Harry reread the letter, although he probably almost had it memorized with how many times he read it that morning. On the back of the card was his address to his flat. Harry seriously considered writing him back, but decided to wait until after the holidays.

Setting the card back on the mantel, Harry continued pacing. At five minutes to midnight, there was a knock on the front door. Harry rushed to the door, took a moment to compose himself, and opened it to the tall, young blonde who stood on his doorstep with a wrapped box.

Harry smiled at Draco, invited him in, and led him to the living area. Both sat on the couch, drinking the cider Kreacher served, and when the clocked chimed midnight, they look at each other, and both said "Happy Christmas" with smiles on their faces.

Harry tentatively leaned forward and pressed his lips to Draco's. Draco kissed back just as cautiously, as if unsure where this was going. When Harry pulled back, grey eyes were smiling at him. "Draco," he said softly.

"Harry," Draco responded.

"Draco, can...can we take this slow?" Harry looked away, fearing the worst.

Draco too his face in his hands and forced Harry to look at him, "As slow as you need."

Smiling, Harry kissed his cheek, and went to get Draco's gift sitting under the tree. Blushing, he handed it to Draco, "Open yours first."

Draco slowly unwrapped the green shiny paper to reveal a box. After opening the box, his face lit up, and he pulled out the black leather journal with the Hogwarts crest imprinted in it. He also pulled out a muggle fountain pen with his name engraved on the side.

"It has a magical enchantment on it where if anyone else opens it," Harry felt this was one of his most brilliant ideas, "anything written in it disappears. And the pen has a charm where it replenishes the ink automatically."

"Thank you," Draco said softly. "How did you know that I enjoyed writing?"

Harry could feel his neck heating up and rubbed it, "I remember seeing a journal in your rucksack during Potions one time at school. It intrigued me what you would write about."

This time, Draco, blushed, and Harry could not help but think of how cute he looked when he did. "Oh, this and that...nothing much." Turning the attention back to Harry, "Open yours! Please." He smiled as he handed Harry the gift.

Unlike Draco, Harry did not take his time to open the gift carefully. Quickly ripping off the paper, he opened the box and pulled out a muggle CD player. Upon closer examination he noticed there was no electric cord coming out the back. He also pulled out a CD of Christmas songs, he smiled when he noticed "Baby, It's Cold Outside" was one of the featured songs.

"I wasn't sure if this place had muggle electrical outlets. So I tinkered with it until I managed to get it running with magic. And, well, I figured since you grew up in the muggle world, you would be more familiar with these items than I am."

Harry set the gift aside and took Draco's hands in his; his thumb was lightly caressing Draco's fingers. He saw Draco shiver and leaned in for a kiss.

Minutes later, Harry kept smirking at Draco across the table as they at a very late Christmas Eve dinner. They had animated conversations about Quidditch, the Ministry, and what common acquaintances were up to. Harry lit the Christmas pudding and the boisterous atmosphere continued.

Sharing butterbeers in the living, Draco stared at Harry for a minute before asking, "What was it like growing up with those Muggles?"

Harry looked away, "What do you mean?"

"I mean, Harry, in the wizarding world, everyone knew who you were. I even grew up in awe of the Boy Who Lived. Did your Muggle family feel the same way?"

Harry was not sure how to respond. He did not want to drag up old memories on such a blissful night. But, if they were to get to know each other, then the skeletons need to come out of the closet.

"They were, well, not as open to magic as you would think...My aunt and uncle are not your average muggle family that has been exposed to wizards."

Draco leaned forward and took Harry's hands in his.

"Well, see, my mum was muggleborn, and I was sent to live with her sister. My aunt was more accepting of it than my uncle, but my uncle that magic...thought I was...Well it doesn't matter now it's all in the past."

Draco leaned close and said, "Harry, you can tell me. I won't make fun of you or anything."

Harry looked at the floor and mumbled, "They thought I was an abomination."

Draco's eyes widened to saucers, and Harry reached up to rub his heated neck. "Harry...Why? How? WHY? You were family, did they not want you?"

"No," Harry tried hard for his voice not crack. "They didn't." He pulled away and walked to the fireplace. "Can we just talk about something else? Please?"

Draco stood and walked next to him, "What did you have in mind?" There was an excited glow in his eyes.

"Well maybe not much talking..." And Harry leaned in for another kiss that night.

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><p>Warning: Do not bribe your characters with Skittles...Then that's all they want...I think Draco is addicted...<p> 


	8. Christmas

I don't know if I have ever thanked you, my faithful readers, for your reviews. But I am truly grateful for your words! Another chapter down! What will Harry and Draco do next?

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><p>Refraction [ri-frak-shuhn]. change of direction of a ray of light, sound, heat, or the like, in passing obliquely from one medium into another in which its wave velocity is different.<p>

**Chapter 8: **Christmas

Harry woke the next morning in the arms of another person. At first he was terrified, but then slowly the night before came back to him.

He blushed as he became more aware of Draco behind him; his body pressed against his, spooning him. He could feel Draco's light breathing and knew he was still asleep. He carefully slipped out Draco's arms, trying not to wake him, and walked to the window.

Sunlight was streaming in, and the snow was blindingly bright. A white Christmas. He hasn't had a white Christmas in awhile. Well, this was his second Christmas _not_ at Hogwarts since he was eleven. Those were happy days. He felt loved and cared for; nothing but happy times.

He had no desire to play in the snow. He hadn't since he was six. Harry closed his eyes and leaned against the cold window, taking deep breaths and willing the memories away.

_There was snow everywhere; it was at least two feet high. Young Harry went out one Christmas morning and was having the time of his life. It did not matter that his only present was a pair of worn out pants that were previously Dudley's. He was going to have fun in the snow._

_He had just finished making his fifth snow angel with someone grabbed him. He knew before he opened his eyes who it was. It was his cousin. _

_The other six-year-old shook Harry so hard his teeth rattled. Harry did not hear the names he was being called due to the ringing in his ears, but he knew they were not nice. Next thing he knew he was face down in the snow, with Dudley forcing his face into it._

_He could feel hot breath on his neck as Dudley growled, "Eat it!"_

_Harry did not want to, he did not know what had been in the snow, but it was becoming hard to breath._

_Harry was rolled over and he gasped for air, Dudley shoved a handful of packed snow into Harry's mouth. Then another handful, soon, Harry's mouth was full of snow, and he could not breathe again. _

_He tried breathing from his nose, but it was impossible, the snow was too packed down his throat. Harry felt panic rip through his body and would have spit it out, or clawed it out, but Dudley was sitting on him. Harry was choking, he could not breathe, fear made tears prick his eyes; Harry was going to die._

_As black spots formed on his vision, the ground started to shake. Harry could not figure out why. England never had earthquakes. Snow began melting rapidly around him. Then Harry heard a shrill scream. Dudley was pulled off of him and Harry could spit out the snow and gasp for air. Never before had he been thankful for precious air, but now he was._

_He looked up and found Mrs. Figg yelling at Dudley and dragging him back to the house. Uncle Vernon had come out onto the patio; he had a frown on his face but a gleam in his eye. _

_Harry was called into the house and locked in his cupboard for the rest of the day. He did not care that he missed Christmas dinner, because from his cupboard he could hear Uncle Vernon laughing as Dudley told him what he did to Harry that day..._

Harry opened his eyes, startled; he spun around ready to strike. He relaxed when he realized it was Draco, not Dudley, not Uncle Vernon, who had reached out and touched his shoulder.

Harry had been leaning against the window so long that his face was numb. He put a hand to his face to rub it and drew back when his hand became wet. Why was his face wet? Was it condensation from the window?

Draco took a tentative step forward and put his hand on Harry's bare shoulder. Kindness and curiosity in his eyes, he held out his other arm, and Harry collapsed into it.

Harry breathed deeply, taking in the smell of Draco. His bare chest was hard and warm; he smelled of musk, books and parchment, and a hint of mint. After minutes of just holding each other, Draco broke the silence around them.

"Want to talk about it? The reason you were crying for the past ten minutes?"

Harry buried his face into Draco's shoulder and shook his head. He did not wish to face his demons now. Not right now. Not with Draco so close to him. He could feel Draco's hand in his hair, smoothing it out.

"Alright, but, Harry, if you need to talk, I can lend you an ear."

Harry nodded and smiled up at Draco, suddenly aware that he had morning breath. He pulled away and slipped a t-shirt over his head, throwing another at Draco, "Come on, we should see what Kreacher prepared for breakfast."

Sitting across from Draco, Harry could not help the blush creeping up the sides of his neck. Never in his life had he been more forward, except for when he practically begged Ginny for sex, but he had insisted that Draco stay the night, that it was simply too late and too cold for him to return home. Draco, although not prepared to stay the night, had agreed. He had originally bunked in a guest bedroom, but Harry told him if he got too lonely he could come and sleep in his bed. Harry had tossed and turned for who knows how long until Draco quietly sneaked into his room and crawled into bed with him.

He suppressed a chuckle, but Draco heard him anyway, and peered at him with a questioning look.

"Things are mighty different from our Hogwarts days," Harry said softly.

Draco looked down at Harry's shirt that he was wearing and did not even attempt to suppress his grin, "No, I don't think they even close to being the same, Potter."

"Malfoy, if you keep that up I'm going to have to turn you out of this house."

They finished their meal and sat on the couch curled in each other arms. Harry saw sunlight streaming in through the window hit a crystal ornament on the tree. He smiled as it made small rainbows dance across the wall.

Harry had his head on Draco's chest, and could feel it vibrating as he spoke, "I always loved the way prisms refract light. Makes it so pretty."

"Malfoy...you like something as girly as crystals?"

"Mhmm, you know, Harry, it kind of describes our relationship."

"How do you mean?"

"Well, the white light is our Hogwarts quarrel, but then something changed, we went through our own prism, and came out completely different people: the multicolored light."

Harry sighed and closed his eyes. "Draco," it still felt weird to call him that, but so right at the same time, "Draco, I don't think it would be a good idea to make this...thing we have public."

Draco looked down at Harry, "Because you are an Auror and I'm a 'dark wizard' or because of our schooldays quarrel?"

"Well, the latter, and because it would come to a real shock to my friends if they weren't told first. And I don't want Ginny to think I ended it with her so I could be with you."

Draco smiled, "So we are together now?"

Harry looked up at him, "If you will have me."

Draco leaned down and kissed Harry.

Harry had never been on the receiving end of kisses like this, normally he was the one with Ginny leaning against him. But Draco knew how to kiss. He could be passionate and heated and tender at the same time. Harry could feel Draco's hands in his hair, and had to stifle a moan. The slightest of touches sent him into a tizzy, and he had no idea why. Draco's tongue sneaked into his mouth, their mouths pressed together, their tongues battled each other, and then Harry's was in Draco's mouth, massaging the top of his mouth. He heard Draco moan as he pushed Harry on his back, his hands still tangled in Harry's hair.

Harry could feel an erection fighting at his pajama bottoms, but he did not care, he grinded his hips against Draco's and wrapped his arms around him. His hands went under Draco's shirt and clawed at his back. There was no room for air between their mouths yet Harry felt like he was not close enough to Draco. That they need absolutely no space between them.

They did not hear the knock on the door, nor the second knock, but they heard the gasps of shock when two people entered the room.

Ron and Hermione stood in the doorway, shock all over Hermione's face and repulsion on Ron's. Harry could feel heat on his face and neck as he and Draco sat up and cleared his throat.

"What the bloody hell, Harry?" yelled Ron. "You broke up with my sister, broke her heart! For this fucking bastard?"

"Ron, listen, that's not why—"

"NO! She was heartbroken over you, Harry! I was going to listen to your side, but after this fucking scene I should—"

"RONALD!"

Everyone, even Draco, turned and started at Hermione, who rarely ever raised her voice in such a manor.

"Ronald Weasley. Harry is your best friend, and you should still hear him out! Granted I am...surprised at his present company, but that doesn't mean he doesn't have feelings too."

Kreacher brought in tea and biscuits, completely oblivious to the mixed emotions around him.

"You want to know why I broke up with your sister? Fine!" Harry could feel the raw emotion he felt yesterday returning, the constricting pain in his chest. "I broke up with Ginny because he cheated on me while we were out looking for Horcruxes, okay?" He could feel the tears running down his face. "And her only excuse was she was lonely. And I can't go and pummel Seamus because she obliviated his memory!"

Ron's face fell, and Harry looked at Hermione, who looked just as crushed. She walked over to Harry, and sat on the side Draco did not occupy, and put her arms around him. Harry cried into her shoulder and could feel Draco's reassuring hand on his leg. He reached down and squeezed it, taking comfort in Draco and Hermione's presence.

When Harry looked up Ron was sitting in a chair across the room, his face in his hands. Harry soon realized that he was crying, and he got up and walked over to his best friend.

"Why would she do this?" Ron was muttering into his hands. "She was raised better than that. Everyone thought you would be married by next summer. How could she hurt you in such a way?"

"I honestly don't know, Ron. And I really don't want to know." The pain in his chest was lifting. "I just want to move on." He turned and looked at Draco, willing his face, his eyes, to let Draco know that he was not a rebound. Draco nodded.

Hermione must have caught the look, because he cleared her throat and looked away. "Well, since you have a guest we should probably get going."

Draco stood, "Don't leave on my account, besides, I need to leave anyway. Christmas with my family is a well, formal affair." He held out his hand to Hermione, a sight Harry thought he would never see. "I hope we can let bygones be bygones, Granger."

Hermione stood and shook his hand and leaned in and whispered something in his ear. Draco blushed and nodded, then excused himself to run upstairs and dress.

Harry gave Hermione a questioning look, but she shook her head and mouthed "later" while nodding towards Ron.

They had just gotten Ron settled with tea and a biscuit, when Draco returned downstairs, hair combed and in his pants he wore the day before, and still in Harry's shirt.

"I'll walk you to the door," Harry got up and led him down the hallway.

"I hope you don't mind if I borrow your shirt," Draco blushed, "but it smells like you."

Harry smiled, and thought of numerous ways to make Draco blush again just because he looked so darn cute. "No, it just means I'll have to see you again and this isn't some one night stand."

Draco blushed deeper, "Happy Christmas, Harry."

"Happy Christmas, and what did Hermione say to you?"

Draco muttered something incoherent and gave Harry a brisk but tender kiss on the lips, then walked out the door and Disapparated.

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><p>The chapter was originally suppose to start at the breakfast table, but Harry needed to get something off his chest, unfortunately he didn't tell Draco.<p> 


	9. Dreams

This one is short guys! Draco wanted a chapter all to himself, and he took all my Snickers Peanut Butter Squares!

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><p>Harry, Harry, why can't you see, what you're doing to me? – Darren Criss, <em>A Very Potter Musical<em>

**Chapter 9: Dreams**

Draco collapsed on his bed in his flat in Clapham. He had his wing in Malfoy Manor, but sometimes he felt he needed to get away from his parents. He showed up at the Manor wearing Harry's clothes, and he had received strange looks from his mother until he went up and changed into "proper" attire.

Christmas at the Manor is always a formal affair. Granted, Draco had not known anything different, but it was right fun lounging in their pajamas after breakfast, just enjoying each other's presence. He wondered how Christmas was for Harry growing up, his aunt and uncle being Muggles and all.

It was a very tiring day, and he had not gotten much sleep. Harry talked in his sleep, but Draco noticed that Harry seemed to calm down when Draco had put his arms around him.

Draco had no idea what he was feeling towards Harry, he never thought of himself as gay at least. He'd dated plenty of girls at Hogwarts, but then again he never had the desire to do anything more than snog.

He stared off into space, then picked up Harry's shirt and breathed deeply. Emotions he had never felt before rushed through him and he closes his eyes.

As he lay back down, breathing in the scent of Harry, his frustrations seemed to melt away. His parents were forcing the issue that he should court Astoria. He liked her and all, and he knew she would make a proper pureblood wife, but Draco did not think that was the life he wanted anymore. He knew that his parents had at one time been in love, but what the First Wizarding War had not changed, the Second had most definitely had. His mother did not respect her husband as much as she did before. Draco did not want that same fate, of sharing the Manor with someone he grew to despise, or worse—despise him.

As he fell into a dream like state, he saw himself growing old in the Manor, alongside a man with bright green eyes and a lightning scar on his forehead.

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><p>The quote thing is from a song written by Darren Criss (if you have not heard of him Google that shit!), it was sung by the character Ginny in <em>A Very Potter Musical, <em>produced by a theatre company called Team Starkid_. _It is posted on Youtube, if you have not seen it, I highly suggest you do!


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